vanilla couples

Gay Therapy for Straight Couples?

gay therapy for straight couples | Uncommon Love LGBTQ Counseling in Portland

One of the most common questions I get asked by prospective couples counseling clients is if I work with straight people at all.  This makes me smile for so many reasons.  

First of all, yes, of course I work with all kinds of couples.  Thank you for noticing I support all kinds of relationships (gay, lesbian, poly, or kinky).  I am glad my marketing is clear.  

Most of the straight couples I work with choose me because they too support all kinds of relationships and loving.  

Many of the couples counseling clients who choose to work with me identify as straight.  But truthfully, most of their heterosexual identity is more flexible or open than rigid.  And because many of their relationships are open or sex-positive their sexual expression and intimate connections are just so much more complex than gay or straight.  

I have seen male-identified (and socialized) clients who only have sex with one female-identified (and socialized) partner but occasionally play with other men.  

I see female identified clients who once dated women but now are monogamously married.  I see bisexual clients who are monogamous with partners.  

I see swingers who identify as straight but give and receive oral sex from people of two genders at parties.  

I see tops who dominate many different genders of bottoms, but only exchange fluids (are fluid bonded) with one partner (of a different gender).  

And I see male-identified (and socialized) clients who identify as straight and are monogamously married to female-identified (and socialized) clients.

The question makes me smile largely because the question makes me think of the beautiful diversity of sexual preferences, play styles, and gender identities within my client group.  

Not one of them can be easily defined by one simple term- straight or gay.  

No matter your gender or sexual identity, if you are looking for an LGBTQ affirming professional in Portland Oregon, give me a call for a free consultation to see if we're a fit to work together.

Gina Senarighi, MS, MA, CPC is a sex educator and relationship coach specializing in polyamory, open relationshipsjealousy, LGBTQ issues and infidelity.  

She can help you:

Contact her for a free consultation to see if working with her is right for you.

Click here to download her free guides to strengthen your relationship (monogamous or not).

What is a Kink-Aware Sex Positive Therapist?

Sex Positive Definition

“The sex-positive movement is a social movement which promotes and embraces sexuality with few limits beyond an emphasis on safe sex and the importance ofconsent. Sex positivity is “an attitude towards human sexuality that regards all consensual sexual activities as fundamentally healthy and pleasurable, and encourages sexual pleasure and experimentation.

The sex-positive movement is a social and philosophical movement that advocates these attitudes. The sex-positive movement advocates sex education and safer sex as part of its campaign.” The movement generally makes no moral distinctions among types of sexual activities, regarding these choices as matters of personal preference.”  

– Definition from Wikipedia

Kink-Aware Definition

“[Providers who] have specific knowledge of kink concepts and lifestyles, have researched and educated themselves in these areas. May have some previous experienced providing professional services to individuals with these interests.”

Definition from the National Coalition for Sexual Freedom

My Work as a Sex Positive Relationship Coach

One of the best questions I get from new clients is about my listing as a sex-positive or kink-aware provider.  Not all of my clients engage in non-traditional sexual activity, but for some of my clients it is especially important to know I have expertise in working with BDSM, fetish, and other kink communities.

I also work with a lot of clients who are just beginning to get creative and explore their sexuality.  Some of them just finished reading Fifty Shades of Grey, and others have held secret fantasies for years and are just now opening up to their partner.  

Often it can be helpful to work with a professional to discuss and negotiate new sexual territory with a knowledgeable and non-judgmental professional.

Even for clients who follow more mainstream or traditional sexual and sensual practices, it can be important to know this is a specialty of mine.  These clients love working with me because I apply the same open non-judgmental approach to my work with all couples- no matter how kinky.  

Watch the video below to learn more!

I closed my psychotherapy and couples counseling practice in 2016 to pursue coaching and consulting.  Contact me to learn more about this powerful change in my work.